| IT'S ABOUT TIME Once upon a time, Alexander the Great was just Alexander, a mediocre, run-of-the-mill general. He tried hard, but usually arrived at the battle scene too early or too late, since watches and clocks hadn't yet been invented. Alexander appeared doomed to obscurity, until a bright Macedonian lad, one Herbie, made a suggestion that changed history. "Sire," he said timidly, "I have been puttering about with diverse rare earths and chemical substances. I have not yet uncovered the secret of transforming base metals into gold, but I have discovered some phenomena that might be of use in our military endeavours." "A new weapon?" "No, sire. A simple device that will enable your eminence to accurately ascertain the proper moment for our armies to arrive upon the scene. It will work quite well until the Timex is invented." "Very interesting. Tell me more." "Well, you take this scrap of cloth, dip it into this special liquid dye, and tie it around your wrist. As we march along in the heat of the day, the liquid gradually evaporates, causing the cloth to slowly change colour at a highly predictable rate, providing an accurate gauge of how many hours have passed." Alexander adopted the idea (taking full credit) and went on to greatness and immortality. And the invention that made it all possible? The piece of cloth that changed the world? It has henceforth been referred to as: Alexander's rag time-band. |
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