Blonde Moment

 

A blonde walked into the pet store and, after looking up and down the aisles, asked the sales clerk for help.

 

"I'd like a box of birdseed," said the lady.

 

"For which kind of bird?" he asked helpfully.

 

"Oh, I dunno," she replied. "Whichever will grow the fastest...."

What did the blonde name her pet zebra? Spot

 

Why do blondes whistle in the shower? So they know which lips to wash.

 

----------------------

Two blondes decide to go duck hunting.  Neither one of them has
ever been duck hunting before and after several hours they still
haven't bagged any.

One hunter looks at the other and says "I just don't understand it.
Why aren't we getting any ducks?"

Her friend says "I keep telling you, I just don't think we're throwing
the
dog high enough."

Why don't blondes double recipes?  
The oven doesn't go to 700 degrees!

What do a blonde and an instant lottery ticket have in common?
All you have to do is scratch the box to win. 

Seriously Hottest Kisses

Seriously hottest kisses


Nice Kiss is on Head.


Sweet Kiss is on Cheeks.


Passionate Kiss is on Lips.


Romantic Kiss is on Neck


And


Seriously Hottest Kiss is on “IRON”










Friends I am collecting Gandhi’s photos.


Please give your contribution to my collection.


A small condition is, It must be on


100, 500 or 1000 rupees note only.










Human brain is the most


Outstanding object in world.


It functions 24 hours a day,


365 days a year.


It functions right from the time we are born,


And stop only when we enter the examination hall.










Think Well Work Well


Eat Well Sleep Well Play Well


And also put ur Mobile inside the same well


Because you r not messageing me... Well










Mujhe raat bhar ye baat sone nahi deti


Zindagi 4 din ki ha to,


Test Match 5 din ka kyun.

The Bull & The Bear

Once upon a time there lived a bear in a cave deep in the woods. Nearby was a meadow in which a farmer kept his cattle -- and one large, ferocious-looking bull. Each day the bear hid at the edge of the woods, watching the bull.










The bear was known as the strongest, most fierce creature for miles around. No other beast in the forest dared to tangle with him. As the bear watched the bull peacefully gazing, he wondered which one of them would win a test of strength. He thought about this for many days. Then one morning he decided to challenge the bull to a fight to the finish.














The bull had just chomped down on a fresh clump of clover when he looked up and saw the bear barreling across the meadow toward him. He stopped chewing. The red flag of danger popped up in his head. The bear skidded to a halt in front of him.










The bull lowered his head menacingly, his sharp horns aimed right for the bear's throat. For long moments they stood in place -- eyeball to eyeball -- neither one of them moving. Finally the bull grew tired of the stare-down and asked, "What do you want, Bear?"




"I want to fight you," growled the bear.




"Why?" asked the bull.




"Because, I want to prove that I am a stronger and better fighter than you are."




The bull laughed. "I thought you really wanted something. You can't possibly win against me. I have sharp horns that can cause terrible injuries."




"And my claws are sharp and quick," the bear shot back. "I have defeated many an enemy -- anyone who would harm my cubs or take away my mate. I am the king of the forest!"




"Then go back to the forest," the bull bluntly advised. "This is the meadow."




The bear blinked in surprise. "I beg your pardon..."




"I mean, what's the point of me fighting with you?" the bull asked. "What would that prove? We are not enemies. I have not harmed your cubs or taken your mate."




"It would prove that I am the strongest."




"Okay," said the bull, smiling. "I'll buy that. You are strongest. Now leave and let me graze in peace."




"Just one cotton-pickin' minute. What do you mean by that?" The bear raised a club-like paw. "I will tear you to shreds. Defend yourself."




"What you do is up to you," the bull answered calmly. "But if you do, what will all your friends -- the ones who are watching us right now -- think about you?"




"They will think that I am the strongest," yelled the frustrated bear.




"I don't think so. I do not choose to fight you just because you choose to fight with me. I would only fight to defend one of the cows in my care. If you attack one of them, then I'd be obliged to give you a good lashing."




"I can't attack them," protested the bear. "They can't fight back. There would be no victory to it."




"Exactly," answered the bull. "But what if you did? And what if I should try to defend them? What if something should happen to me? Who would protect them then? You? Would you trust me to protect your cubs if something happened to you? What would happen to your family if you lose the fight?"




"I never thought of that," said the bear.




"Go back into the woods, Bear," said the bull as he turned to walk away. "Live in peace. And I will stay in the meadow and do the same."




The bear turned toward the woods. He had come spoiling for a fight -- to prove which one was the strongest.






But he had learned an important lesson from a very wise bull. In peace, there are no losers.

Height Of Innocence

Eight type of ORGASM

There are at least EIGHT types of ORGASM of a WOMAN. 

1. The Optimist - Oh Yes, Oh Yes, Oh Yes 

2. The Pessimist - Oh No, Oh No, Oh No 

3. The Confused - Oh Yes, Oh No, Oh Yes, Oh No

4. The Traveler - Ahh, I'm coming, I'm coming

5. The Religious - Oh God, Oh God

6. The Userer - Ahh, More, More, More

7. The Murderer - Ahh, If you take it out, I'll kill you

8. The Submariner - Mmm...OHHH... Deeper... Go DEEPER!

Nail in Feet Prank

While using Nailgun, you should be very careful
else results can be very dangerous
Here is a video with the results, or so called fake results ;).

What an Awesome Reply

It was a hot meeting at the office conference hall. All the people from the department had been called. The VP was looking much tensed.




The mood was so bad. My friend asked me -"Hey, what is this meeting all about? I told - May be they will decide on when to have the next meeting. People around smiled at each other.






Then the VP started talking. It was about the recent attrition rate that was so high. Around 10 people had put in their papers. All experienced guys. It was quarter end and so work was huge. If we do not complete the work on time, we need to be paying heavy penalty said the VP. The VP turned to the manager and told "Hey - take how much ever resources you want. Recruit or take them from other departments. But complete the work in another 25 days. Take people and complete it man.




To this the sweet manager replied "Sir! Give me one wife and nine months and I shall show you results. Don't give me nine wives and one month. I cannot do anything." Everyone looked at him blank. The VP was not prepared for this answer. We looked at the manager and thought "What an Awesome Reply man!"

Santa Di Beemari Te Doctor Da Ilaaz

Ek Din Santa Doctor Kol Geya Te Doctor Ne Pucchya: “Ki Problem Hai”
Santa: “Doctor Saab Mere Tatte Neele Pe Gaye Ne”
Doctor Ne Keya: “Eh Te Zehar Failda Peya Hai Ehna Nu Kattna Payega”
Santa: “Katt Do Ji”
Santa Do Din Baad Fir Doctor Kol Pahunch Gaya
Santa: “Dr Saab Mera Lunn V Neela Ho Gaya Hai”

Doctor Ne Checkup Karan To Baad Keya: “Eh V Kattna Payega Nahi Taan Zehar Hor Fail Jayega Peshab Vaste Naali (Pipe) Laa Davange”
Santa Fir Do Din Baad Doctor Kol Vapis Aa Gaya
Santa: “Dr Saab Hun Te Naali V Neeli Pe Gayi Hai”
Doctor Ne Checkup Keeta Te Khush Hoke Boleya

“Oye Santya Beemari Pata Lagg Gayi Hai, Tere Kachhe Da Rang Utarda Peya Hai“

Adult Hindi Movies Name

• Hasina Ki Gaand Mein Pasina
• Hot Chicks With Short Dicks
• Ghaagre Mein Dhoom-Dhadaaka
• Lund Andar -Dum Jallandar
• Teen Randiyo Ki Daastan.
• Cheen Rani Ki Peeli Chut – A Mystery.
• Tamboo Mein Bamboo
• Tharak Ke Pujari
• Bhaag Bhosdi Aandhi Aayi
• Andehri Raat Mein Diya Tere Haath Mein.
• Tu Jhuk Mein Daloon
• Salwaar Mein Talwar !
• Woh Ek Thi Uspar Teen Thhe
• Kambal Mein Oye Hoye
• Chamatkaar Se Hua Balatkaar
• Lund Wale Fuddiyaan Le Jayenge
• Gali Hui Choot Ka Sada Hua Pissu
• Phakad Ke Panty Chod De Aunty
• Haseena Dikhaya Vagina
• Khoon Bahri Gaand
• Lund-The Fucker
• Abla Nari Ka Babbla Bhari
• Choot Ka Bhoot
• Pati Fauj Mein Patni Mouj Mein

Ek tatte wala aadmi

Ek Aadmi ke Sirf ek tatte hote hain, woh job interview ke liye jaata
hai.. Inteview pass karne ke baad, woh Interviewer se kehta hai uske
sirf ek hee tatte hai, yeh sunkar Interviwer uska Job Confirmation
letter cancel kar deta hai.
Woh aadmi doosre jagah kaam dhoondne jaata, wahan bhi jab Employer
ko maloom padtha hai kee uske ek he tatte hai, usko regret letter
thama deta hai,
Yeh silsila kaafi dino tak chalta rehta hai, akhir usko ek din Job
mil hee jata hai
Woh khush ho kar Employer ka dhanyavad karta hai, aur usse kehta
ha “Aapne yeh jaankar kee mere ek hee tatte hai, phir bhi kaam pe
rakha, issliye mein office roz ek ghante pehle aaonga”
Employer usse kehta hai ” Tumhare ek hee tatte hai, issliye tum ek
ghanta late aao”
Aadmi pareshan ho jata hai aur poochta hai ” Aisa kyun”
Employer : “Bhai, yahan aane ke baad, Log ek ghante apne Tatte hee
khujate rehte hai, tum time pe aake kya karoge”

Nawab ka Lund

ek�baar�ek nawab hota hai. Waqt ke saath nawabi chali jati hai or
khane peene ke vande ho jate hai.�ek din aakhir gareebi se dukhi
hoker kuch paise ka jugad karne ke sochte hai or mohalley ke sare
baccho ko bulakar kahte hai jao baccho sub 10-10 paise laker aao
main tum subko tamasha dikhata hu.
Sub bacche apne ma baap se 10-10 paise laker nawab ko dete hai or
tamasha dikhane ko bolte hai….Nawab paise laker subko bhaga deta
hai, Sub bacche gar jaker apne parents se complain karte hai to
puura mohalla nawab ke gar pahuch jata hai….itne logo ko dekhkar
nawab ki g**d phat jati hai or wo mafee mangta hai subse or sub
baccho ko agle din bulata hai Tamasha dikhane ke liye.
Agle din phir sare bacche nawab ke gar aate hai or tamasha dikhane
ko bolte hai…to nawab apni salwar utar ke subko lund dikha dete to
bacche dar jate hai or phir apne parents ko complain karte hai ki
nawab sahib ne tamashe ke naam per lund dikha diya…is baar sare
garwale bahut krodit ho jate hai or nawab ke gar per talware laker
pahuch jate hai.
ek�aadmi: nawab benchod baher nikal.
nawab baher aata hai to sub mohalle wale chillaker bolte hai Nawab
sahib aapko sharm nahi aati ki aapne tamashe ke naam per in masoom
baccho ko apna lund dikha diya….
Is per Nawab bola….Ye to waqt ki ma chud rahi jo Nawabi lode 10-10
paise main dekhne ko mil rahe hai…..