Mar 16, 2011

Kg Rhymes


KG RHYMES

Niple Niple Litle StaR

can i fuck u in my car

up above ur Breast so high

always Milky never Dry

let me Press it dont feel Shy

Open Ur BRA let me try.


I Am In Love

 

Daughter : I am in love with neighbor, So i am running away with him.











Dad: Thanks , U have saved my money & time


Daughter: Dad, I am reading the letter left by mom



Girls

Great ADS

Drink


DRINK

A guy asks a beautiful lady: "Can I buy you a drink?"

She says: "No Thanks, alcohol is bad for my legs!"

"Ohhh, do they swell??"

"No, they spread.."


BLONDE

You Can't Please Everyone

You Can't Please Everyone

An old man, a boy & a donkey were going to town.  

The boy rode on the donkey & the old man walked. As they went along they passed some people Who remarked it was a shame the old man Was walking and the boy was riding.

The man and boy thought maybe the critics were right,So they changed positions.

Then, later, they passed some people who remarked, 'What a shame, he makes that little boy walk.'

So they then decided they'd both walk! 

Soon they passed some more people who thought They were stupid to walk when they had a Decent donkey to ride.  

So, they both rode the donkey.

Now they passed some people Who shamed them by saying how awful to Put such a load on a poor donkey.

The boy and man figured they were probably right, So they decide to carry the donkey.   

As they crossed the bridge,They lost their grip on the animal And he fell into the river and drowned.
  

The moral of the story?
If you try to please everyone, You might as well.. Kiss your ass goodbye!

Riddles of Alphabet

Riddles of Alphabet

Q: What letter of the alphabet is an insect?
A: B. (bee)

Q: What letter is a part of the head?
A: I. (eye)

Q: What letter is a drink?
A: T. (tea)

Q: What letter is a body of water?
A: C. (sea)

Q: What letter is a pronoun like "you"?
A: The letter " I "

Q: What letter is a vegetable?
A: P. (pea)

Q: What letter is an exclamation?
A: O. (oh!)

Q: What letter is a European bird?
A: J. (Jay)

Q: What letter is looking for causes ?
A: Y. (why)

Q: What four letters frighten a thief?
A: O.I.C.U. (Oh I see you!)

Q: What comes once in a minute, twice in a moment but not once in a thousand years?
A: The letter "m".

Q: Why is the letter "T" like an island ?
A: Because it is in the middle of waTer.

Q: In what way can the letter "A" help a deaf lady?
A: It can make "her" "hear.

Q: Which is the loudest vowel? 
A: The letter "I". It is always in the midst of noise

Q: What way are the letter "A" and "noon" alike?
A: Both of them are in the middle of the "day".

Q: Why is "U" the happiest letter? 
A: Because it is in the middle of "fun".

Q: What word of only three syllables contains 26 letters? 
A: Alphabet = (26 letters)

Q: What relatives are dependent on "you"?
A: Aunt, uncle, cousin. They all need "U".

Q: What is the end of everything? 
A: The letter "g".

Margarine Vs Butter


Margarine Vs Butter

Margarine was originally manufactured to fatten turkeys. When it killed the turkeys, the people who had put all the money into the research wanted a payback so they put their heads together to figure out what to do with this product to get their money back.

It was a white substance with no food appeal so they added the yellow colouring and sold it to people to use in place of butter. How do you like it? They have come out with some clever new flavorings… 

DO YOU KNOW.. The difference between margarine and butter? 

Read on to the end…gets very interesting! 

  • Both have the same amount of calories.
  • Butter is slightly higher in saturated fats at 8 grams; compared to 5 grams for margarine.
  • Eating margarine can increase heart disease in women by 53% over eating the same amount of butter, according to a recent Harvard Medical Study.
  • Eating butter increases the absorption of many other nutrients in other foods.
  • Butter has many nutritional benefits where margarine has a few and
  • only because they are added!
  • Butter tastes much better than margarine and it can enhance the flavours of other foods.
  • Butter has been around for centuries where margarine has been around for less than 100 years .
And now, for Margarine..

  • Very High in Trans fatty acids.
  • Triples risk of coronary heart disease .
  • Increases total cholesterol and LDL (this is the bad cholesterol) and lowers HDL cholesterol, (the good cholesterol)
  • Increases the risk of cancers up to five times..
  • Lowers quality of breast milk.
  • Decreases immune response.
  • Decreases insulin response.
  • And here's the most disturbing fact…. HERE IS THE PART THAT IS VERY INTERESTING!
  • Margarine is but ONE MOLECULE away from being PLASTIC… and shares 27 ingredients with PAINT

These facts alone were enough to have me avoiding margarine for life and anything else that is hydrogenated (this means hydrogen is added, changing the molecular structure of the substance). 

You can try this yourself:

Purchase a tub of margarine and leave it open in your garage or shaded area. Within a couple of days you will notice a couple of things:

  • no flies, not even those pesky fruit flies will go near it (that should tell you something)
  • it does not rot or smell differently because it has no nutritional value ;
  • nothing will grow on it. Even those teeny weeny microorganisms will not a find a home to grow. Why? Because it is nearly plastic . Would you melt your Tupperware and spread that on your toast?

Share This With Your Friends…..(If you want to butter them up')!

Helping Hand

Helping Hand

One night, at 11:30 p.m., an older African-American Woman was standing on the side of an Alabama highway Trying to endure a lashing rain storm. Her car had Broken down and she desperately needed a ride.

Soaking wet, she decided to flag down the next car. A young white man stopped to help her, generally Unheard of in those conflict-filled 1960's. The man Took her to safety, helped her get assistance and Put her into a taxicab.

She seemed to be in a big hurry, but wrote down his Address and thanked him. Seven days went by and a Knock came on the man's door. To his surprise, a Giant console color TV was delivered to his home.

A Special note was attached.

It read:

"Thank you so much for assisting me on the highway The other night. The rain drenched not only my Clothes, but also my spirits. Then you came along. Because of you, I was able to make it to my dying Husband's bedside just before he passed away… God Bless you for helping me and unselfishly serving Others.."

 

Japan Earthquake 'Radiation Leak' text message is fake



'Radiation' text message is fake
 
A fake text message warning people that radiation from the Fukushima nuclear plant has leaked beyond Japan has been panicking people across Asia.
 
The SMS message, purporting to come from the BBC, has been circulating around Asian countries since Monday.
 
It warns people to take necessary precautions against possible effects of radiation.
 
FAKE TEXT/E-MAIL IN FULL
 
BBC Flash news : Japan Government confirms radiation leak at Fukushima nuclear plants. Asian countries should take necessary precautions. If rain comes, remain indoors first 24 hours. Close doors and windows. Swab neck skin with betadine where thyroid area is, radiation hits thyroid first. Take extra precautions. Radiation may hit Philippine at around 4 pm today. If it rains today or in the next few days in Hong Kong. Do not go under the rain. If you get caught out, use an umbrella or raincoat, even if it is only a drizzle. Radioactive particles, which may cause burns, alopecia or even cancer, may be in the rain.
 
The BBC has issued no such flash but the hoax has caused particular panic in the Philippines.
 
Some media reports suggest that workers and school children there were sent home after the rumours began to spread, prompting the Philippines government to issue an official denial.
 
Disasters such as that currently unfolding in Japan often trigger a rise in scam texts and e-mails intended to fool users into downloading malware or simply to spread panic.
 
The US Computer Emergency Readiness Team (US-CERT) has told computer users to be wary of potential e-mail scams, as well as fake anti-virus and phishing attacks regarding the Japan earthquake and the tsunami disasters.
 
"Such scams may contain links or attachments which direct users to phishing or malware-laden sites," it said.
 
In the Philippines, the Department of Science and Technology has held a press conference to reassure the public that they are safe even if radiation levels in Japan continue to rise.
 
On Tuesday morning, reactor 2 at the Fukushima Dai-ichi nuclear plant became the third to explode in four days.
 
Radiation has reached harmful levels but there is no suggestion that it is affecting anything other than the immediate area.
 
Officials have extended the danger zone, warning residents within 30km (18 miles) to evacuate or stay indoors.
 

Amazing Love Quotes


Amazing Love Quotes

  1. You hit me with the truth;but I think a bus would have hurt less
  2. I want to be your favorite HeLlO and your hardest GoOdByE
  3. Sometimes I wish I could just fast forward my life to see if it was worth it all in the end...
  4. Save an Egg Crack a Smile!
  5. Everything you want..comes after you stop looking for it
  6. It's a complicated emotion::I think I'd miss you, even if we never met
  7. Having the love of your life break up with you and say, "We can still be friends" Is like your dog dying and your mom saying,"You can still keep it."
  8. It's NEVER a mistake to care for someone...

Men Giving Advice

F Fly Air Canada




 

 
 
 
 
 
Fly Air Canada
 
A mother and her young son were flying Air Canada from Toronto to Calgary .  The little boy, who had been looking out the window,turned to his mother and asked, 'If big dogs have baby dogs and big cats have baby cats, why don't big planes have baby planes?'
   
The mother, who couldn't think of an answer, told her son to ask the flight attendant.
     
So the boy went down the aisle and asked the flight attendant, 'If big dogs have baby dogs and big cats have baby cats, why don't big planes have baby planes?'
       
The busy flight attendant smiled and said, 'Did your mother tell you to ask me?'
       
The boy said, 'Yes, she did.'
       
'Well then, you go and tell your mother that there are no baby planes because Air Canada always pulls out on time.  Ask her to explain that to you.'
  
 
 

Dog for Sale



 

 

 If this doesn’t make you laugh….you are having a really bad day!!!


 

A guy is driving around the back woods of Montana and he sees a sign in front of a broken down shanty-style house: 'Talking Dog For Sale ' He rings the bell and the owner appears and tells him the dog is in the backyard.

The guy goes into the backyard and sees a nice looking Labrador retriever sitting there.


'You talk?' he asks.


'Yep,' the Lab replies.


After the guy recovers from the shock of hearing a dog talk, he says 'So, what's your story
?'



The Lab looks up and says, 'Well, I discovered that I could talk when I was pretty young. I wanted to help the government, so I told the CIA. In no time at all they had me jetting from country to country, sitting in rooms with spies and world leaders, because no one figured a dog would be eavesdropping.'
'I was one of their most valuable spies for eight years running. But the jetting around really tired me out, and I knew I wasn't getting any younger so I decided to settle down. I signed up for a job at the airport to do some undercover security, wandering near suspicious characters and listening in. I uncovered some incredible dealings and was awarded a batch of medals.' 'I got married, had a mess of puppies, and now I'm just retired.'

The guy is amazed. He goes back in and asks the owner what he wants for the dog.


'Ten dollars,' the guy says.

'Ten dollars? This dog is amazing! Why on earth are you selling him so cheap?'


'Because he's a liar. He never did any of that shit.



 

 


I KNOW YOUR SMILING :-)

 

 

 

 
 

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