Apr 20, 2011

CREATION OF THE PU**Y












 
Creation Of The Pussy
Seven wise men with knowledge so fine,
created a pussy to their design.
First was a carpenter, strong and bold,
using a hammer and chisel, he gave it a hole.
Second was a butcher, endowed with wit,
using a knife, he gave it a slit.
Then came a tailor, tall and thin,
with a piece of red velvet, he lined it within.
Fourth was a hunter, short and stout,
using a piece of fur, he lined it without.
Then came a fisherman, nasty as Hell,
he threw in a fish and gave it a smell.
Next was a preacher, whose name was McGee,
he touched it and blessed it and said it could pee.
Finally, a sailor, the dirty little runt,
he fucked it and sucked it and called it a cunt.
==========
 
Q: How can you tell if two lesbians are twins?
A: They lick alike.

Q: What's a tiger?
A: A five-hundred-pound pussy that eats you.

Q: When do you know you're really lonely?
A: Your own tongue starts to feel good in your mouth.
======
 
One morning a little girl ran inside and said Daddy, Daddy my sister
and the man you hired last week are up on the hay loft in the barn
on all that new hay we just bought. She has her dress up and he has
his pants down. I think they are about to piss all over that new
hay!
========
 
There once was a girl from Decatur
Who got laid by a big alligator.
Now, nobody knew
The result of that screw,
Because after he laid her, he ate her.
 
There once was a man from Madrass
Whose balls were made out of brass
When he'd bang 'em together
They'd play stormy weather
And lightning would shoot out of his ass 
 
Q. What has 2 grey legs and 2 brown legs?
A. An elephant with diarrhea.

Q. Why did the Avon lady walk funny?
A. Her lipstick

Q. What do you call a lesbian with fat fingers?
A. Well hung.

=====
This guy wakes up out of a deep sleep and, feeling real horny, nudges his wife awake and asks, "Why don't we get it on, eh?" She replies, "I have an appointment at the gynecologist tomorrow and you know I don't like to make love the night before." So the husband agrees and rolled back over and started to go back to sleep.
A few minutes later, he nudges his wife again and asks, "You don't by any chance have a dentist's appointment tomorrow, do you?"