Extraordinary Indians - Dr Ravindra Koelhe

Doctor
who charges only Rs 2.00

'If you want to serve mankind, go and work among the
poorest and most neglected.'. ........Dr Ravindra Koelhe, who has been serving the
tribals of Melghat, Maharashtra , for 24 years.

Dr. Ravindra Koelhe, MD, lives and runs a clinic in
Melghat, Maharashtra . His fee is Rs 2 for the
first consultation and Rs 1 for the second. Not only is he a doctor and social
worker, Dr Koelhe has also taken the government to court for having failed in
its duty to protect the Korku tribals of the region.

After completing his MBBS, he worked in Melghat for a
year-and-a-half only to realise that he needed more expertise to handle the
problems of the tribals. So he went back to medical college for an MD in preventive
and social medicine.

"I
have now been here for 24 years. In those days there were two public health
centres and no roads. Once a week, I used to walk 40 km from Dharni to
Bairagarh to reach my clinic. I used to see at least one tiger every month.
Since the last three years I haven't seen a single one," he says
remembering his early days as a young doctor.

After completing his MBBS from Nagpur University , he decided to work in rural India . An
ardent follower of Mahatma Gandhi and Vinoba Bhave, he was also influenced by
Ruskin Bond who wrote, 'If you want to serve mankind, go and work among the
poorest and most neglected.'

He toured the rural areas of Gujarat, Maharashtra and Madhya Pradesh and
decided that Gadricholi in Maharashtra was the
most backward amongst his travels and decided to work there. His mother
discouraged him since it was a Naxalism affected area. She told him that
Melghat was equally backward and that he should work here instead.Dr Koelhe has been in Melghat since then. It has been 24 years now

Good excuse

A man bought a new Mercedes to celebrate his wife leaving him and was
out on the interstate for a nice evening drive.
The top was down, the breeze was blowing through what was left of his
hair and he decided to open her up. As the needle jumped up to 80 mph,
he suddenly saw flashing red and blue lights behind him.

“There’s no way they can catch a Mercedes,” he thought to himself and
opened her up further. The needle hit 90, 100…..Then the reality of
the situation hit him.

“What am I doing?” he thought and pulled over.

The cop came up to him, took his license without a word and examined
it and the car.

“It’s been a long hard day, this is the end of my shift and it’s
Friday the 13th. I don’t feel like more paperwork, I don’t need the
frustration or the overtime, so if you can give me a really good
excuse for your driving that I haven’t heard before, you can go.”

The guy thinks about it for a second and says, “Last week my nagging
wife ran off with a cop. I was afraid you were trying to give her
back!”

“Have a nice weekend,” said the officer.

Misunderstanding Manners

A new waitress in a Bridge Club complained to the manager that the
members of their renowned club were so disrespectful and foul that she was
afraid she may face sexual harassment from the customers.
She explained, "As I was about to serve the Horde hours, I heard a man
say, "Lay down and let's see what you've got." Another man laughed, "I've got
strength but no length." And this rude man says to the lady sitting next to
him, "Take your hand off my trick!""
I was barely recovering and a lady spoke, "You jumped me twice when you
didn't have the strength for one raise."

Another lady was talking about protecting her honor and two other ladies
were talking and one said, "Now it's time for me to play with your husband
and you can play with mine."

Then this one woman says, "Well, I guess we'll go home now. This is the
last rubber."

Myths about IT

After lots of meet ups with non-IT friends, relatives, strangers etc, you
will notice that the moment you say that you are an IT guy, they have
already made some assumptions about you.

Myth #1: If you haven't been onsite ...u are a loser

Uncle: "Tum 3 saal se IT company mein kaam kar rahe ho na?"
Me: Haan uncle ......bas ....."
Uncle: "Tum videsh nahi gaye?"
Me: "Nahi uncle project mein requirement nahi hai onsite kaa"
Uncle: "Lekin woh deepak ko toh maanna padegaa.... vo chote
sheher se hai.....bade college se nahi hai ...fir bhi usne jamke mehnat ki
aur usse company ne USA bheja!"

Aaaha! thats the problem. People think that the smarty pants are sent on
site while the loser ones are the people left behind in India. So the
assumption is that if you haven't been on site then you don't work hard nor
you have any sincerity and... ok that's enough for now.

Myth #2: If you are not in the biggies... u are a loser

Auntyji : "Beta, kaunsa company?"......"Kabhi suna nahi"....."Kaha hai ye?"
Aunty: "Tumko Info*** mein nahi mila kya?" (in short: "tum second grade gadha lagte ho")

Then I have to make efforts to tell them how I actually work in a much niche technology. In case the opposite person is technologically sane then I give him some product development 'funda' (arrogance).

Myth #3: You can fix any computer..and calculator and may be clocks too

Most of the computer engineers around must have at east once gone to a
friend's place only to fix his /her comp. The task can be from installing a
software (next..next.. finish) to fixing a computer which gives electric
shocks when its metal areas are touched.

Myth #4: You have lots of money

Once I met up with my friends from school ...from various fields. I just
mentioned that it is such a pain to go to office nowadays and said that I
wanted to buy a car.
Friend1: "what problem do u have man .. u are an IT waala"
Friend2: "Tu toh Honda CRV le saktaa hai"
Me: "CRV!! aabey CRV kyaa mere pass VCR lene ka paisa nahi hai"
Even after 5 minutes of convincing them weren't getting convinced.

Myth #5: Coding means sitting in front of the computer

During my college days , my classmate had an encounter with a guy from
mechanical dept:

Mech guy: "Your Computer engineering is a big nautanki.... four years You
learn the same grey dabba... and all you ppl do is sit nicely in front Of
that dabba and punch the keys"

Well I don't completely disagree

Myth #6:

One more thing which oldies say : " Now you work in such a big company , you are settled , you should marry now !! " OMG this salary is not enough for one poor soul.. how to handle two ???

Myth #7:

In Diwali...u get questions like......"Are you gonna get a bonus this
Diwali.....??" And when we reply in the negative.....they seem so
surprised...!!!!!!!

Myth #8: A common issue that I have seen:

When I tell anybody that I work with C**, many times I get a reply "My
son/daughter/relative Mr/Ms XXX also works with C**. You must be knowing
him/her" and if I answer in the negative, they feel disappointed (they
think.....may b nobody wants to knows me).

How to explain to them that there are around thousands of employees in my
company, and I cannot know everybody in my ODC, forget about knowing
everybody in the company. L LoLzzzzzzzzzzzzz.....

Add ons:

#How many times do you face this question
"What does your company make...???"

Very logical question but.....How do you answer this one?

Pray for Leroy

*"Anyone with needs to be prayed over, come forward, to the front at the
altar,"* *the Preacher says.

Leroy gets in line, and when it's his turn, the preacher asks: "Leroy, what
do you want me to pray about for you."

Leroy replies: "Preacher, I need you to pray for my hearing."*
*The preacher puts one finger in Leroy's ear, and he places the other hand
on top of Leroy's head and prays and prays and prays, he prays a blue
streak for Leroy.

After a few minutes, the Preacher removes his hands, stands back and asks,
"Leroy, how is your hearing now?"

Leroy says, "I don't know, Reverend, it ain't til next Wednesday!"*

SOFTENING JUDGEMENT

Moving Beyond Appearances 
 
It is our natural inclination to judge people, since it happens without our even thinking about it. We take one look and summarize a whole person—overweight, pretty, stylish, sloppy. This habit comes from the mind’s need to categorize the world in order to be able to function without becoming overwhelmed. 
 
When we judge, we are looking for pertinent information, trying to determine whether the person approaching is a threat, an ally, or someone we don’t need to worry about. This way of looking at people makes sense in a dangerous context, but in our daily lives it leads to an overly simplistic reading of the people we meet. 

If you have ever judged someone dismissively, only to have them become a dear friend once you got to know them, you know the hazards of the judgment cycle firsthand. An experience like that may have led you to soften your natural tendency to believe your first impressions. We will always notice things about the people we meet, but as we become more conscious of the shortcomings of judgment, we won’t be satisfied with our surface observations. 
 
We may notice that someone is driving an expensive car, but we will decide whether to befriend her based on getting to know her over time. We will not rule out a friendship with someone with messy hair, especially if he turns out to have a great sense of humor and a kind heart. Liking or disliking a person is a choice you will naturally make, but it will be after you have gotten to know them. 

Next time you notice yourself judging somebody, try to send love, light, or blessings to the person you were judging. Then try to listen to them openly or look them in the eye and learn something about them. If this is not easy for you, remember not to judge yourself either. Trust that with practice, you will successfully disable your habitual patterns. 
 
As you do, you will find a whole new dimension of perception opening up to you, allowing you to see beyond the surface and into the essence of the people you meet. 


Sue Divine 
"Even Kings and Emperors with heaps of wealth and vast dominion cannot compare with an ant filled with the love of God."

solution!!!!

A woman goes to the doctor, beaten black and blue. . . . .

Doctor: "What happened?"
Woman:" Doctor, I don't know what to do. Every time my husband comes home drunk he beats me to a pulp...."
Doctor:"I have a real good medicine against that: When your husband comes home drunk, just take a glass of chamomile tea and start gargling with it. Just gargle and gargle".
2 weeks later she comes back to the doctor and looks reborn and fresh again.
Woman:" Doc, that was a brilliant idea! Every time my husband came home drunk I gargled repeatedly with chamomile tea and he never touched me.
Doctor:" you see how keeping your mouth shut helps!!!" 

Spices up your love life .....!!

Trust, understanding, respect and bonding, what else couples can ask for in a healthy relationship to form the foundation for a lasting union.

But little do the couples know that even the most wonderful relationship can go for a toss if love starts fading away. In today's modern times with a hectic workflow to maintain, couples often take each other for granted. And very often, they fail to realise the importance of the little things in a relationship that add the much needed zing in their otherwise boring and dull relationship.

It could be something as simple as saying 'I love you' or wooing your mate with a surprise gift – all that matters is the urge to show that you care and love. These small love gestures might not seem too precious in a relationship, but they can leave your partner craving for more.

Relationship counselor Dr. Geetu Bhardwaj explains, "In every relationship, it's important to maintain a healthy bond. If the couple starts assuming that the other partner knows about your feelings, then there would be very little conversation and sharing of feelings. In such situations, a vacuum starts building and this adversely affects the relationship in the long-run. So it's suggested that small expressions of love should be conveyed every now and then to improve the quality of a relationship. "

So the next time boredom starts taking away the fun from your love paradise, try these precious gestures, which can surely bring back the passion like never before...

1. Say that you love : Loving someone is a pleasant feeling, but what's more important is to tell them that you love them. Saying 'I love you' is the best way to connect to your partner and share what you feel for each other.

Love-o-meter : Marriage and relationship counsellor Dr. Medha Sharma says, "Most of the times, the frequency of saying 'I love you' drastically drops as the relationship graduates to another level. So to revive the missing love, couples must seek help from these three words. Women, in general, are keener to say, 'I love you' much too often and in turn they expect the same from their male partners too."

2. Plan a sex picnic : Physical intimacy is probably one of the best ways to bond with your partner. But when it's about recharging the love lull, couples should think out-of-the-box. Forget the bedroom boredom and move out to an exotic spot with your partner.

Love-o-meter : Relationship counsellor, Dr. Amita Mishra opines, "Planning a romantic holiday with your lover can surely be a good idea that will allow you to spend quality time together, which might be tough otherwise. Make sure that the vacation is only intended towards comforting each other and there are lots of pleasure moments, sans any household tensions and office worries."

3.. Exchange romantic gifts : While in an affair, you might have gone crazy buying almost all sorts of gifts for your mate. But as it transforms into a long term relationship, these gifts lose their importance. So renewing the habit of exchanging gifts frequently is a sure shot way to make your partner feel loved.

Love-o-meter : "It's not about being materialistic in a relationship, but gifts are an expression of love. A flower, a card, a soft toy, a dress or anything else, whatever you choose for your beloved carries a message which is conveyed through that gift. Thus, exchanging gifts is a great way to make each other feel special," feels Dr. Geetu.

4. Arrange for surprise dinners : Endless luncheons, dinners, parties and night outs are often the routine in the first few months of a relationship. But gradually, it's just home sweet home and cooking in the kitchen which take over. Going out for a surprise dinner is indeed a superb way to woo your partner and bring back the love spark.

Love-o-meter : "A surprise candlelit dinner has always been a hot pick when it comes to arranging something special for your better half. You can plan something really lavish like a special menu and instrumental music, of course, of your partner's choice. Also, act a bit naughty with each other and enjoy each moment like there's no tomorrow," suggests Dr. Amita.

5. Know your partner better : You would often think that you share a great level of understanding and trust with your partner, but there's always more to a couple's chemistry. Couples pay less heed to indulging in intimate conversations with each other and hence they don't know what's exactly going in their partner's life. If you feel that the love bond is getting weaker, take some time out and sit with your mate just to hear them out and bare their heart in front of you.

Love-o-meter : "Initiating a conversation with your partner can really bring you close to them all over again. It gives them a reassurance that you care for them and the comfort zone created henceforth is a sustaining factor in a relationship. Casual or romantic talks often act as catalyst in restoring lost love in your relationship, " asserts Dr. Medha.

THE POOR FARMER

The farmer was selling his peaches door to door. He knocked on a door and a shapely 40 something woman dressed in a very sheer negligee answered the door. He raised his basket to show her the peaches and asked, 'Would you like to buy some peaches?'

She pulled the top of the negligee to one side and asked, 'Are they as firm as this?'

He nodded his head and said, 'Yes ma'am,'' and a little tear ran from his eye.

Then she pulled the other side of her negligee off asking, 'Are they nice and pink like this?'

The farmer said, Yes,' and another tear came from the other eye.

Then she unbuttoned the bottom of her negligee and asked, 'Are they as fuzzy as this?'

He again said, 'Yes,' and broke down crying.

She asked, 'Why on earth are you crying?'

Drying his eyes he replied, ''The drought got my corn, the flood got my soy beans, a tornado leveled my barn, and now I think I'm gonna get screwed out of my peaches.

How to test she is virgin

A young man was planning to get married and asked his doctor how he could tell if his bride is a virgin.

The doctor said, 'Well, you need three things. A can of red paint, a can of blue paint and a shovel..'

The man was astonished and asked, 'So what do I do with these?'

The doctor replied, 'Before the wedding night, you paint your one ball red and the other ball blue. If she says, 'That's the strangest pair of balls I ever saw', you hit her head with the shovel.'.... .

You think I'm enjoying myself

*An angry wife was complaining about her husband spending all his
time at the pub, so one night he took her along.*
*

"What'll ya have?" he asked.

"Oh, I don't know. The same as you I suppose," she replied.

So the husband ordered a couple of Jack Daniel's and threw
his down in one go. His wife watched him, then took a sip
from her glass and immediately spat it out.

"Yuck, that's the most disgusting thing I've ever tasted!"
she spluttered. "I don't know how you can drink this stuff!"

"Well, there you go," cried the husband. "And you think I'm
out enjoying myself every night!"
*

Spread the Stupidity !!!!

Only in America ......do drugstores make the sick walk all the way to the back of the store to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.








Only in America .....do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries, and a diet coke.




Only in America ......do banks leave vault doors open and then chain the pens to the counters.




Only in America ......do we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveway and put our useless junk in the garage.


Only in America ..........do we buy hot dogs in packages of ten and buns in packages of eight..


Only in America .....do they have drive-up ATM machines with Braille lettering.




EVER WONDER ...
Why the sun lightens our hair, but darkens our skin?


Why can't women put on mascara with their mouth closed?


Why don't you ever see the headline 'Psychic Wins


Lottery'?


Why is 'abbreviated' such a long word?




Why is it that doctors call what they do 'practice'?






Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor, and dishwashing liquid made with real lemons?




Why the man who invests all your money is called a broker?




Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour?


Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food?




Why didn't Noah swat those two mosquitoes?




Why do they sterilize the needle for lethal injections?




You know that indestructible black box that is used on airplanes? Why don't they make the whole plane out of that stuff?!


Why don't sheep shrink when it rains?


Why are they called apartments when they are all stuck together?






I like this one!!!
If con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of progress?


If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal?


Now that you've smiled at least once, it's your turn to spread the stupidity and send this to someone you want to bring a smile to (maybe even a chuckle)...in other words, send it to everyone. We all need to smile every once in a while.
Spread the Stupidity.

Reduce your weight

This fat guy - goes to a popular GYM, sees an ad for a new gym guaranteeing to reduce anyone's weight by 5, 10 or 20 kilograms on the first day. So he goes and tells them he wants to lose 5 kg.


They lead him into a huge gym with all kinds of ropes and parallel bars and ladders and tell him to wait a minute.


He's standing there when on the far side of the gym a door opens and out steps a beautiful girl, with a sign saying "If you catch me, I'm yours."


He starts running, and just as he gets close, she starts picking up speed. Before he knows it, he's running all over the gym, up the ladders, down the ladders, across the parallel bars, here and there. And just as he's about to catch the blonde, pop, she disappears through a door.


In comes the management who lead him to the showers, and then weigh him. Sure enough, he lost exactly 5 kg.


He's back on the street and starts to think. "Jesus, I was so close to catching her. If I had a little more time..."
So he races back to the gym and says, "I want to lose 20 more kg."
"No problem," says the manager.


Again he is led to the large gym. This time he's standing by the door when it opens. Out comes a Gorilla with a sign.
"If I catch you, you're mine."

What is "STRESS"?

STRESS is already a part of daily living. You may never know it but you are already affected by this issue. You shout at your kids or nag your partner about something. You seem to raise an issue out of a particular event even if it is not true. You also tend to be suspicious at some points. All these are due to stress.

Scientifically, stress is a state of high tension or pressure, resulting from an accident or injury or a psychological reaction of heightened emotional response. Certain occupations are particularly stressful, such as acting, advertising, controlling air traffic, politics, investing and gambling. As an effect of stressful emotions such as panic attacks, fear and anger, the blood pressure rises, the pulse beats faster, breathing is accelerated, digestion stops, and the adrenal glands become overactive.


MAJOR FACTS FOR STRESS:


1. It can be caused by many factors. Fear and anxiety are the greatest causes of psychological stress. In modern times people are constantly beset by the threat of calamities. They fear depression and inflation, unemployment, cancer and heart failure, missiles and bombs and famine. At home they may be confronted with marital incompatibility, quarrels, family illness, or financial troubles.


2. It can also cause something. Many illnesses are caused by mental stress, including ulcers, spastic constipation, diarrhea, high blood pressure and migraine headaches. Sometimes latent mental disorders are precipitated by stressful circumstances, as in the case of manic-depressive psychosis, schizophrenia, hysteria and neurasthenia.


3. It can worsen through time. When a person is subjected to repeated stresses, she is likely to develop what people call nervous breakdown, an unscientific but expressive term. The stress produced by the problems of everyday living has led to the widespread use of tranquilizers, a last resort when there seems to be no escape from a difficult situation.


4. It happens in daily living. Stress exists in almost every human activity and is not the same as nerve tension. Some stress is beneficial since it may stimulate action.


5. It can be lessened through healthy intimate relationships. Psychiatrists also found out that for the avoidance of excessive stress being married is better than being divorced or single.


6. There are major stressful events connected to it. Studies also showed that the death of a child is the most stressful of any life’s events. Other items include a jail sentence, major financial problems, divorce and the beginning of an extra-marital affair. Some of the environmental factors that may be related to stress are the status of health, the social class, and the size of the household.


7. There are also some stresses that cannot be controlled. Too much stress can show itself in various emotional, behavioral and physical signs, and the signs of stress differ extremely according to each individual.




Usual Physical, Emotional and Behavioral Signs of Stress:


The physical indications of stress include sleep interruptions, tense muscles, annoyance, gastrointestinal problem, and exhaustion. Its emotional and behavioral indications consist of apprehension, fear, alterations in eating practices, depleted energy, and mood swings. All of the symptoms given cannot tell whether a person has an elevated stress level because these indications may be due to other medical or mental problems.


It is also a fact that persons in stress are most likely to maintain harmful activities like drug and alcohol addiction, excessive cigarette smoking, and poor eating habits. These harmful activities can extremely add to the severity of the indications connected to stress.


Remember that all people may be prone to stress – no matter what age you are in and no matter what status of life you have. The extent may vary also depending on how you take up the challenge that goes with it. If you have a support system with you, it is easy to do away with the situation. But at the worse, it may only lead you to panic attacks.

The Cork

Two men are in a locker room taking a shower after their exercise class, when one notices the other has a huge cork stuck in his butt.

If you do not mind me saying," said the second, "that cork looks very uncomfortable. Why do you not take it out?"

"I regret I cannot", lamented the first. "It is permanently stuck in my butt."

"I do not understand," said the other.

The first says, "One day, I was walking along the beach and I tripped over an oil lamp. There was a puff of smoke, and then a huge old man in an American flag attire with a white beard and top hat came boiling out. He said, "I am Uncle Sam, the Genie. I can grant you one wish."
I said, "No shit?"

10 Annoying Phrases

10 Annoying Phrases That Serve No Purpose

These phrases are as unnecessary as they are insufferable. Not only do statements like “no offense” and “whatever” grate on the ear, they don’t transmit any kind of information, which last we checked was the basic purpose of language.

10. It is what it is
This newcomer is the epitome of an ear-grating phrase that means nothing.

9. It’s all good
The inclusion of “all” only accentuates how much you don’t mean what you are saying.

8. To be honest
Not only is this phrase usually followed by something best left unsaid, but it also implies everything else you say is dishonest.

7. No offense
A phrase even more insincere than it is superfluous.

6. Whatever
In a recent survey, 47 percent of Americans chose this word compound as the most annoying phrase of all. Meaning you have permission to smack anyone who uses it and isn’t a 12-year-old girl. (And it’s a close call on smacking any 12-year-old girl who uses the “w” word.)

5. Don’t get me wrong
Isn’t it implicit in most human communication that your intention is always to be correctly understood?

 

4. With all due respect
Really?

3. Everything happens for a reason
A completely worthless utterance that probably doubles as a vicious taunt to those who have undergone terrible hardships.

2. At the end of the day
At the end of the day, you will be preparing for bed.

1. Going forward
Saying this is like announcing your next footstep.

Five Short Stories For Men, By Men

ONE I was walking through the cemetery this morning and saw a guy crouching down behind a tombstone. I said, "Mourning?." He said, "No, just taking a shit." TWO When I was a kid, I used to pray every night for a new bike. Then I realized that God doesn't work that way. So I stole a bike and asked Him to forgive me. THREE My girlfriend was in labor with our first child. She was shouting, "Get this out of me! Give me the drugs!" She looked at me and yelled, "You did this to me, you bastard!" I casually replied, "If you remember, I wanted to stick it up your ass but you said, 'That would hurt too much'." FOUR I went to an extremely attractive female doctor today for my annual checkup.. She told me that I had to quit masturbating. I asked why and she said, "Because I'm trying to examine you." FIVE My girlfriend and I were making love when she looked up at me and said, "Make love to me like in the movies." So I turned her over on all fours, stuck it in her ass, pulled out, flipped her back over and came all over her face and hair. I never saw her again after that night. I guess we don't watch the same movies.

Men Are Like

For all those men who say, Why buy a cow when you can get the milk for free. Here's an update for you: Nowadays, 80% of women are against marriage, WHY? Because women realize it's not worth buying an entire pig just to get a little sausage. Men are like.... 1. Men are like Laxatives. They irritate the crap out of you. 2 Men are like Bananas . The older they get, the less firm they are. 3. Men are like Weather . Nothing can be done to change them. 4. Men are like Blenders You need one, but you're not quite sure why. 5. Men are like Chocolate Bars .. Sweet, smooth, & they usually head right for your hips. 6. Men are like Commercials . You can't believe a word they say. 7. Men are like Department Stores ... Their clothes are always 1/2 off! 8. Men are like .. Government Bonds .... They take soooooooo long to mature. 9.  Men are like .. Mascara . They usually run at the first sign of emotion. 10. Men are like Popcorn . They satisfy you, but only for a little while. 11.. Men are like Snowstorms . You never know when they're coming, how many inches you'll get or how long it will last. 12! . Men are like Lava Lamps . Fun to look at, but not very bright. 13. Men are like Parking Spots All the good ones are taken, the rest are handicapped. Now send this to all the remarkable women you know, as well as to any understanding good-natured, fun kinda guys you might be lucky enough to know!

Solution

A woman goes to the doctor, beaten black and blue. . . . .

Doctor: "What happened?"

Woman: "Doctor, I don't know what to do. Every time my husband comes home drunk he beats me to a pulp...."

Doctor: "I have a real good medicine against that: When your husband comes home drunk, just take a glass of chamomile tea and start gargling with it. Just gargle and gargle".

2 weeks later she comes back to the doctor and looks reborn and fresh again.

Woman: "Doc, that was a brilliant idea! Every time my husband came home drunk I gargled repeatedly with chamomile tea and he never touched me.

Doctor: "You see how keeping your mouth shut helps!!!" 

THINGS MAY NOT BE WHAT THEY APPEAR

Two traveling angels stopped to spend the night in the home of a wealthy family.

The family was rude and refused to let the angels stay in the mansion's guest room.

Instead the angels were given a small space in the cold basement.

As they made their bed on the hard floor, the older angel saw a hole in the wall and repaired it.

When the younger angel asked why, the older angel replied,

"Things aren't always what they seem."

The next night the pair came to rest at the house of a very poor, but very hospitable farmer and his wife.

After sharing what little food they had the couple let the angels sleep in their bed where they could have a good night's rest. >

When the sun came up the next morning the angels found the farmer and his wife in tears.

Their only cow, whose milk had been their sole income, lay dead in the field.

The younger angel was infuriated and asked the older angel how could you have let this happen?

The first man had everything, yet you helped him, she accused.

The second family had little but was willing to share everything, and you let the cow die.

"Things aren't always what they seem," the older angel replied.

"When we stayed in the basement of the mansion, noticed there was gold stored in that hole in the wall.

Since the owner was so obsessed with greed and unwilling to share his good fortune, I sealed the wall so he wouldn't find it."

"Then last night as we slept in the farmers bed, the angel of death came for his wife. I gave him the cow instead.

Things aren't always what they seem."

I Know

 I know I am a human but listen to my complaints first:
 
 I sleep like a dog thinking about my work load whole night.

 

 I get up in the morning like a horse

 

 I go to work running like a deer

 

 I work all the day like a donkey

 

 I run around for 11 months like a bull without any holiday.

 

 I wag my tail in front of all my bosses

 

 I play with my children like a monkey if I get time.

 

 I am like a rabbit before my wife 

Security In Pakistan....

         Government of Pakistan has tightened security.

Wise Words From Maxine .. !

. 5 answers you always wanted to know

THE  5  ANSWERS  WE  HAVE  ALL  BEEN WAITING  FOR! 
 Q:  WHAT ARE THE SMALL BUMPS AROUND A WOMAN'S NIPPLES   FOR?
A:  It's Braille for 'suck here'. 
 Q:  WHAT  IS AN AUSTRALIAN KISS? 
A:  It's the same as a French kiss, but 'down under.'

 Q:  WHAT DO YOU DO WITH 365 USED CONDOMS?
A: M elt them down, make a tire, and call it a Goodyear.

Q:  WHY WERE HURRICANES NORMALLY NAMED AFTER  WOMEN? 
 A:  Because when they come, they're wild and wet.  But  when they go, they take your house and car with  them. 
  Q: WHY DO GIRLS RUB THEIR EYES WHEN THEY GET UP IN THE  MORNING  ? 
 A:  Because they don't have any balls to  scratch... 

 BONUS  QUESTIONS & ANSWERS 
 Q: What is a man's Utimate embarrassment?   

   A:  Running into a wall with an erection and breaking his nose.