Alternative Ways To Say No

Alternative Ways To Say No 

• I'd rather have my nipples chewed off...by a pack of wild dogs.
• I'd rather suck the snot out of a gorilla's nose...until the back of his head caves in!
• I would rather crush my foreskin between two tables while being bitch whipped by a fat, mustached geek named Spyros.
• I'd rather drink a gallon of turpentine...and piss on a forest fire.
• I'd rather suck cow snot...through a straw.
• I'd rather watch Rosie O'Donnell and Roseanne mud wrestle... in the nude.
• I'd rather bungee jump...with the harness tied to my penis...with your mom lying naked in the landing zone.
• I would rather spend ten hours getting a tattoo on my back...and then find out it's the wrong one.
• I'd rather have the ten strongest 300 pound linemen in the NFL play tug of war with my nut sack....each side of 5 pulling a separate nut in a different direction.
• I would rather have my lower legs stripped with a wood planer...and then wear wool socks...in August.
• I'd rather stick my nose up someone's ass...after he just finished taking a shit.
• I'd rather shave my poison-ivy covered legs ... with a dull barber's razor...and no water or soap.
• I'd rather french kiss a barracuda.
• I'd rather butt fuck a rattlesnake... in a phone booth.
• I'd rather nail my dick to the middle of a 2x4 and set both ends on fire...and try to get loose with a butter knife.
• I would rather have sex with Pee Wee Herman in the daylight, without a bag to put over his head.
• I'd rather drink for a week from the septic tank...of the 700 pound man next door.
• I'd rather wipe my anus with barbed wire.
• I'd rather insert and break a slender glass rod in my penis... then tie it in a knot.
• I'd rather lick an elephant's asshole...after he had just dropped a load of steaming diarrhea.
• I'd rather run naked through a rosebush garden...then jump into a pool filled with chlorine.
• l would rather lie under an elephant with diarrhea...in August...with my mouth propped open.
• I'd rather ride a donkey naked through the desert...with snapping turtles attached to my nipples.
• I'd rather be tied to a chair...and forced to listen to Barry Manilow tunes..while having my tonsils removed with a rusty spoon.