Dec 15, 2009

About Desi

Q. How do desis in states have fun ?
    A. Read technical books
  
    Q. What do you call it when a desi tries to imitate an American ?
    A. Artificial Intelligence
   
    Q. What does a desi's intelligence say to his man-hood ?
    A. You are a fictious character.
   
    Q. Why do desis go to a bar ?
    A. To stand in a corner and look at the blondes on the sly.
   
    Q. Why is it good to have a desi friend ?
    A. You can get your assignments done.
  
    Q. What is a desi's favorite rhyme ?
    A. Earn money. look funny. (like a zombie, having spent a lifetime
     in the lab)
   
    Q. How do you make a desi's eyes light up ?
    A. Wave a dollar bill on his face.
   
    Q. What is a desi's most exciting part of life ?
    A. Doing an assignment for a girl.
   
    Q. Why do desis drink a can of beer ?
    A. so they could get high.
  
    Q. Why do desis wear underwears ?
    A. Because they could have wet dreams.
  
    Q. What do desis do for lovemaking ?
    A. Read penthouse.
  
    Q. What do you call a desi between two blondes ?
    A. A misfit.
  
    Q. What do you call a desi's brain ?
    A. A conundrum.
   
    Q. How does a Professor change a desi's mind ?
    A. Offer a RA.
  
    Q. Why do desis like spicy food ?
    A. To avoid constipation.
  
    Q. Why do desis wear goggles ?
    A. To look at blondes
  
    Q. What do desis mean by fun ?
    A. sighting blondes sitting in a car with sun glass doors.
  
    Q. What do you call a desi gathering ?
    A. Techinical conference.
  
    Q. When does a desi smile ?
    A. After seeing his pay check.
  
    Q. When do desis go to the temple ?
    A. Just before the finals week.
  
    Q. Why is Cinemax's (cable) Friday after dark so successful ?
    A1. Because, all desis watch it.
  
    Q. Why does warner cable show X rated movies ?
    A. Because desi's won't pay otherwise.
  
    Q. Why are blue films made ?
    A. So desis know what sex is all about.
  
    Q. Why do desis drown in a swimming pool ?
    A. Because they have pot bellies.
  
    Q. What does a desi do on a date ?
    A. Bore the hell out of the girl's mind by talking about his
    assignments and how he solved the problems.
   
    Q. What is a desi's most exciting night ?
    A. Sitting alone in the lab and reading Alt.sex
  
    Q. How can you punish a desi ?
    A. Ask him to talk to a girl without offerring to do her assignment.
  
    Q. Why don't desis wish other desis ?
    A. Because, they are scared the other might ask for a quarter.
  
    Q. How do you confuse a desi ?
    A. Ask him questions about sexuality.
   
    Q. What is the desi's chronic speech impediment ?
    A. His accent.
   
    Q. What do you call a desi who says he dated a blonde ?
    A. A braggart.
  
    Q. What do you call a desi girl who isn't beautiful yet stupid ?
    A. Piddle shit
  
    Q. How do you identify a stupid desi ?
    A. Give him some money and see if he doesn't look gratified.
   
    Q. How does one desi confront the other ?
    A. By playing chess.
   
    Q. How does a desi measure his perseverance & stamina ?
    A. Watch all the X-rated movies shown on a friday night and still
       feel no sexual urges.
  
    Q. How does a desi confuse another desi ?
    A. Speak with an american accent.
  
    Q. What are desis famous for floating in the swimming pool ?
    A. Because of their strikingly prominent tummies.
   
    Q. How do you excite a desi ?
    A. Give him a book about the Theory of Relativity.
   
    Q. Why are desis cockeyed ?
    A. Because, they never look at a blonde straight.
   
    Q. How do you describe a desi ?
    A. A short zombie who looks intimidated.
  
    Q. Who do you call a smart desi ?
    A1. One who can drink two cans of beer and still walk straight.
    
    Q. What is a desi's philosophy of life ?
    A. Eat, sleep and study.
   
    Q. Why are desis immune to STDs ?
    A. Because they never have sex.
   
    Q. Why does a desi buy a condom ?
    A. To add to his collector's items.
  
    Q. How does a desi bragg ?
      A. Tell fellow desis that a blonde smiled at him.
   
    Q. What is the difference between a priest/nun and a desi ?
    A. The latter has no choice but to stay a virgin.
   
    Q. What do you call a stupid desi ?
    A. A techinical fault.