Most Easy Ways To Ditch Your Girlfriend

Being honest is mighty tough. But let’s be honest for once. There are times when nothing seems to be wrong in a relationship.

If you are an apparently lucky guy, your girlfriend could be the highest ranking babe in the most wanted list. She might have the brains to outwit the best player of chess you have ever known. She might have Kate Winslet’s face, Uma Thurman’s height, Meg Ryan’s smile, Jennifer Lopez’s butt: a killing, rarer-than-rare combination. Her voice might be so melodious that, when she speaks, it seems as if Mariah Carey is on a song.

The problem: she is too perfect for your comfort. Or, even if she isn’t, something doesn’t seem to be working right. You need to part ways but don’t know how. So, what do you do?

Be busy when she is free: Have you guys worked out your weekly offs such that yours coincides with hers? No problem. Find some additional work to stick around at the workplace that day. Once, twice, thrice, that is all it will take to create an issue. An intense conversation later, let her know with simulated despair that things aren’t working out.

Invite guests as often as possible: Whenever she comes down to your place, make sure you have a buddy as a guest too. If she is immensely tolerant, she will suffer the intrusion a few times. If not, she will break up with you that very day. That way, you won’t even feel guilty about letting her down.

Find friends to chat with: Whenever the two of you go out partying, make sure you catch up with your buddies and chat about everything under the sun. She will get bored, initially. She will get bugged, thereafter. She will leave you, finally.

Create some suspicion: This one is the fourth wonder in this series. Try looking hassled when she sees you. If she asks you what has happened, stammer a bit to convey unease. When the boss calls you, step out of the room and whisper into the receiver. Then, come back to the room with an uncomfortable look on your face. A few such episodes, and she will flush you out of her life.

Breaking up need not be a consequence of occasional infidelity or, worse still, nymphomania. It can take place simply because two people are too different. When that realisation dawns, wriggling out is the only solution. That is not difficult, if you keep your cards close to the chest and play them right.

How to free yourself from bad habits

If you’ve been promising yourself that you’re going to ditch that bad habit for a while but have never quite got around to doing so, it could be time to take the plunge. To help ensure your success and make the process a little less painless, check out these 10 ways to break bad habits.

Change one thing at a time

You may have a few vices you would like to be rid of, but it is important that you don’t try to break all your bad habits at once. You’re not superhuman and trying to kick a smoking habit, give up chocolate and stop biting your nails all at the same time is probably going to be hard to achieve. Instead, prioritise and pick the habit you most urgently need to change first. Also, try to set a definite goal to work towards rather than a vague “I’m going to stop being so unhealthy”. Identify what exactly it is you need to do (or stop doing) and make that your focus.

Go public

When trying to kick a bad habit, it is important to tell at least one person about it so that you have somebody to be accountable to. When you are craving a cigarette on your lunch hour it is far easier to give in to your craving if you have nobody to answer to than if you know your colleague is going to quiz you later. You could even consider starting up a blog so that others can follow your progress – having to write about your lapses for others’ viewing may help you think twice about giving in.

Recruit a friend

Even better than just telling someone about your goal, if you know someone who’s been talking about giving up the same bad habit for a while, or who has been inspired by your decision, why not talk them into getting onboard too? Having someone else who knows what you’re going through is great motivation as you will always have someone to call for a moan or some support when the going gets tough.

Take it one day at a time

Setting out to break a bad habit with the thought of “I can never do so-and-so ever again” can be extremely daunting; instead, tell yourself, “I won’t eat junk food/ smoke a cigarette/ have a gossip for the rest of today”. Concentrating on kicking your habit one day at a time makes it seem a lot more achievable, and each day that you beat that habit will inspire you to try again tomorrow. For added motivation, try charting your success on a calendar, marking each day that you have resisted your habit.

Prepare for weak moments

Although it is great to go into this positively, being too confident – and failing to prepare for those moments of weakness – could be your biggest mistake. Don’t rely on being too disciplined to fail; instead accept that we all lack willpower at times and try removing temptation to prepare for those weak moments. Clear the cupboards of chocolate, stay out of stressful situations, or get some distance from friends people who encourage you to drink, for example – make it as difficult for yourself to indulge your habit as you can.

Replace your bad habit with a good one

Cutting something out of your life entirely can be difficult, inconvenient and even plain depressing. To compensate for the sudden gap in your life, try finding substitutes for your bad habit that help to ease the pain. For example, swap junk food (like crisps) for healthy snacks (such as popcorn), or try replacing swear words with other, more innocent phrases (think Ross and Rachel’s “boohockey” and “brother pucker” in the sitcom Friends). You could also try taking up a hobby to compensate for the time you previously spent indulging a TV or shopping habit or hanging out in bars.