A lady was walking down the street to work, and she saw a parrot on a perch in front of a pet store.
The parrot said to her, "Hey lady, you are really ugly."
Well, as you can imagine, the lady is furious! She stormed past the store to her work.
On the way home she saw the same parrot, and it said to her, "Hey lady, you are really ugly."
She was incredibly ticked now.
The next day the same parrot again said to her, "WOW lady, you are still really ugly."
The lady was so ticked that she went into the store and said that she would sue the store and kill the bird if the manager didn't take care of this problem.
The store manager apologized profusely and promised he would make sure the parrot didn't say it again.
When the lady walked past the store that day after work, the parrot called to her, "Hey lady."
She stopped and said, "Yes?"
The bird paused, then said, "You know."
Dec 12, 2009
diary of teh cruise
*THE CRUISE*
*DEAR DIARY. DAY ONE*
All packed for the cruise ship - all my sexiest dresses and make-up.
Really excited.
*DEAR DIARY. DAY TWO*
Entire day at sea, beautiful and saw whales and dolphins.
Met the Captain today - seems a very nice man.
*DEAR DIARY. DAY THREE*
At the pool today. Also some shuffle boarding and hit golf balls off the
deck.
Captain invited me to join him at his table for dinner.
Felt honoured and had a wonderful time.
He is very attractive and attentive.
*DEAR DIARY. DAY FOUR*
Won $800.00 in the ship's casino.
Captain asked me to have dinner with him in his own cabin.
Had a luxurious meal complete with caviar and champagne.
He asked me to stay the night but I declined.
Told him I could not be unfaithful to my husband.
*DEAR DIARY. DAY FIVE Pool* again today, got sunburned. Went inside to
drink at piano bar for rest of day.
Captain saw me, bought me several large drinks.
Really is charming.
Again asked me to visit his cabin for the night.
Again I declined.
He told me if I didn't let him have his way with me, he would sink the ship.
I was shocked.
*DEAR DIARY. DAY SIX*
Saved 1,600 lives today. Twice.
-----
"We are here to add what we can to life, not to get what we can from life."
- William Osler
"If you only have a hammer, you tend to see every problem as a nail." -
Abraham Maslow
"Tough times never last, but tough people do." - Robert H. Schuller
Every saint has a past.
Every sinner has a future.
*DEAR DIARY. DAY ONE*
All packed for the cruise ship - all my sexiest dresses and make-up.
Really excited.
*DEAR DIARY. DAY TWO*
Entire day at sea, beautiful and saw whales and dolphins.
Met the Captain today - seems a very nice man.
*DEAR DIARY. DAY THREE*
At the pool today. Also some shuffle boarding and hit golf balls off the
deck.
Captain invited me to join him at his table for dinner.
Felt honoured and had a wonderful time.
He is very attractive and attentive.
*DEAR DIARY. DAY FOUR*
Won $800.00 in the ship's casino.
Captain asked me to have dinner with him in his own cabin.
Had a luxurious meal complete with caviar and champagne.
He asked me to stay the night but I declined.
Told him I could not be unfaithful to my husband.
*DEAR DIARY. DAY FIVE Pool* again today, got sunburned. Went inside to
drink at piano bar for rest of day.
Captain saw me, bought me several large drinks.
Really is charming.
Again asked me to visit his cabin for the night.
Again I declined.
He told me if I didn't let him have his way with me, he would sink the ship.
I was shocked.
*DEAR DIARY. DAY SIX*
Saved 1,600 lives today. Twice.
-----
"We are here to add what we can to life, not to get what we can from life."
- William Osler
"If you only have a hammer, you tend to see every problem as a nail." -
Abraham Maslow
"Tough times never last, but tough people do." - Robert H. Schuller
Every saint has a past.
Every sinner has a future.
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