Jun 14, 2011

How it all started





A little known history of the internet. 
 
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Most people think the Internet evolved from a US military communications network.  Wrong!  The Internet actually started in ancient times, as you'll come to know when you read this story.
In ancient Israel , it came to pass that a trader by the name of Abraham Com did take unto himself a young wife by the name of Dot.

Dot Com was a comely woman, broad of shoulder and very long of leg.  Indeed, she was often called Amazon Dot Com.

One day Dot Com said unto Abraham, her husband: "Why dost thou travel so far from town to town with thy wares, when thou couldst trade without ever leaving thy tent?"

And Abraham did look at her - as though she was several saddle bags short of a camel load - but simply said: "How, dear?"

And Dot replied: "I will place drums in all the towns and drums in between.  And the drums will send messages saying what thou hast for sale.  And the drums will reply telling you who hath the best price.  And the sale can be made with the drums, and delivery made by Uriah's Pony Stable (UPS)."

Abraham thought long and decided he would let Dot have her way with the drums.  And the drums rang out and they were good.  Abraham sold all the wares he had at a price more than fair, without ever having to move from his tent.

To prevent neighbouring lands from overhearing what the drums were saying, Dot invented a system that only she and the drummers knew.  It was called Many Sounds of Drum Over Sands (MSDOS).  She also developed a language to transmit ideas and pictures - Hebrew To The People (HTTP).

But this success didst arouse much envy.  A man named Maccabia did secrete himself inside Abraham's drum so he could learn much about the system and the language, and steal some of Abraham's business.  But he was soon discovered, arrested and prosecuted - for insider trading.

Across the land the young men did adopt Dot Com's trading as doth the horsefly take to camel dung.  So many and so passionate were they that they came to be called Nomadic Ecclesiastical Rich Drumming Sybarites, or NERDS.

And lo, the land was so feverish with joy at the new riches and the deafening sound of drums that no one noticed that the real riches were going to one enterprising young drum dealer named Brother William (who lived by the Gates of the NERDS).  He befriended every drum maker in the land and indeed did insist that all drums be made to speak only MSDOS.
Brother William, ever the astute businessman and NERD, didst offer Abraham an offer he could not refuse, so from that time forward the drums would speak only for Gates.

And Dot did say: "Oh, Abraham, what we have started is being taken over by others."

And Abraham looked out over the Bay of Ezekiel , or eBay as it came to be known, and said: "We must leave a legacy for our children.  It must be a name that for all time will relate what we are."

And Dot replied: "We are yet Young Ambitious Hebrew Owner Operators."
"YAHOO," said Abraham.  "That will be our legacy."  And since it was Dot's idea, they named it YAHOO Dot Com.

But Abraham's cousin Joshua, a Gregarious Energetic Educated Kid (GEEK) had greater ideas than even Brother William.  And soon he was using Dot's drums to find things around the countryside, and it was found to be most useful.   It soon became known as God's Own Official Guide to Locating Everything (GOOGLE).

And that is how the Internet came to be.





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