The 10 Hottest Movie Teachers
I can honestly say I've never wanted to bang one of my teachers. I see these stories in the news about how teenage boys are getting to nail, impregnate, visit in jail, and eventually marry their school teachers and can't help but wonder where the hell these women were when I was growing up. My education was delivered by women with giant chalky asses and eye sweat. Movie teachers, for the most part, are nothing like the real thing and thanks to Mike from New Jersey, who emailed in the idea, I've found ten that are worthy of getting a detention or two. Seriously though, I had one teacher that looked like she lit her face on fire every morning and was dragged by a bus to get to work. Not hot.
Before we start, a little something to get you in the mood.
5. Miss. Honey - MATILDA (1996)
Yes Billy, I f*cked Ash.
This goes to show that you can be the nicest, warmest, most wonderful, caring, and gentle women on Earth and someone is still going to want to tap that ass. Maybe it's the ARMY OF DARKNESS ties that do it for me. Maybe it's mommy issues. Maybe Embeth Davidtz is just too sneaky-sexy to ignore. Whatever it is, I never pictured myself writing about this movie with phrases like "tap that ass".
4. Ms. Ji-young Uhm - SEXY TEACHER (2006)
The first yearbook picture to have a fold out.
Kim Sa-rang is unbelievably hot, which is why she was crowned Miss Korea in 2000 and pushed in front of a camera soon afterwards. The premise for this film is basically this: Hot teacher comes to school where everyone wants to do her. You might never see it so I've included one of her hottest moments below.
3. Miss. Vaughn - BILLY MADISON (1995)
Nice pillows.
Imagine actually having the opportunity to bang your third grade teacher while you were still in the third grade. Billy (Adam Sandler) gets that chance and makes good with it. I always find myself fascinated with Bridgette Wilson after watching this movie so I finally looked up her nude résumé. Not much. She does some partial in THE REAL BLONDE but there's nothing to write Pete Sampras about. I wonder if Sampras has done any quality nudity.
2. Miss Honeywell - PORKY`S (1982)
I love the smell of jockstrap in the morning.
You might remember her better as Lassie. This scene is great not only for Kim Cattrall's locker room obsession and howling but also watching the boys in gym class trying to run lay-up lines. Nothing, however, is better than the assistant coach. Let me just show you instead of babbling. Sadly, the only clip I could find was in Italian. For some reason though it seems even funnier. Probably NSFW.
1. Miss Davis - VARSITY BLUES (1999)
I must like this movie a lot more than I thought I did. Not only does it top this list but also takes top honours in my Top 10 Movie Cheerleaders a few months ago. Now, Miss Davis starts out pretty normal. Her encouragement during sexual education class is a little uncomfortable but necessary. It's not until a little later in the film do we get to see exactly what she's describing.
Now this is the type of night school I'd like. Your teacher gets naked, rides a pole, continuously pinches her nipples, and sits down with you for a beer afterward. Perfect attendance I tell ya.
I think I just swallowed my chalk.
