Pages

Jan 17, 2012

Pickled In Rum


 PICKLED IN RUM
 
The horse and the mule live for 30 years,
And know nothing of wines and beer;

The goat and sheep at 20 die,
And never get a taste of Scotch and rye.

The cow drinks water by the tonne
And at 18 is mostly done
Without the aid of gin and rum.

The cat in milk and water soaks,
And then in 12 short years it croaks.

The modest, sober, bone-dry hen
Lays eggs for others, and then dies at 10. 
 
All animals are strictly dry,
They sinless live and swiftly die.

But sinful, ginful, rum-soaked men
Survive for three score years and ten,

And some of them, though very few,
Stay pickled till they're 92.
 
                                       Khushwant Singh, himself 92


A Chinese Guy Calls 911


 A Chinese Guy Calls 911

Caller: Hello, can I speak to Annie Wan?
Operator: Yes, you can speak to me..
Caller : No, I want to speak to Annie Wan!
... Operator: Yes I understand you want to speak to anyone. You can speak to me. Who is this?
Caller: I'm Sam Wan and I need to talk to Annie Wan! It's urgent.

Operator: I know you are someone and you want to talk to anyone! But what's this urgent matter about? Caller: Well.. just tell my sister Annie Wan that our brother Noe Wan was involved in an accident. Noe Wan got injured and now Noe Wan is being sent to the hospital. Right now, Avery Wan is on his way to the hospital.

Operator: Look, if no one was injured and no one was sent to the hospital, then the accident isn't an urgent matter! You may find this hilarious but I don't have time for this!

Caller: You are so rude! Who are you?
Operator: I'm Saw Ree.
Caller: Yes! You should be sorry. Now give me your name!!
Operator: That's what I said. I'm Saw Ree!

__._,_.___

Research


 

__._,_.___