Jan 20, 2010
GAYATRI MANTRA understood
GAYATRI MANTRA understood
OM bhuurbhuvaH svaH
tatsaviturvareNyaM
bhargo devasya dhiimahi
dhiyo yonaH pracodayaat .
The Rig Veda (10:16:3)
OM - the Infinite beyond Conception, Brahman, Supreme Lord and State of Being
bhuur - Protector of the earth, the material sheath, The Life breath of the Universe. From the feet to the navel center.
bhuvaH - the Mental Worlds One of the meanings is the sky. The Lord who pervades and eliminates all miseries. From the navel to the throat center.
svaH - I AM ONE WITH GOD - the Spiritual Worlds, One of the other meanings is the heavens. He is all Bliss and blesses His devotees with happiness. From above the throat center to the thousand petaled lotus.
tat - That (That Thou Art)
savitur - The SUN, Creator, Preserver and Self Luminous, the central mantra of the Solar Science.
vareNyaM - Most fit to be worshipped. Most choice worthy - most adorable, enchanting.
bhargo - The burning splendor of the Sun that dispels ignorance, and therefore sorrows and miseries.
devasya - The 'Deva', The God, He who is All Bliss, The Joyful One, The Shining One, The Revealer of All Glory
dhiimahi - We meditate upon Him
dhiyo - Bhuddi, intelligence, Wisdom
yo - which
naH - our
pracodayaat - Inspires, enlightens, illumns
January 20th Stolen Jokes
One day Bill complained to his friend that his elbow really hurt. His friend suggested that he go to a computer at the drug store that can diagnose anything quicker and cheaper than a doctor. ''Simply put in a sample of your urine and the computer will diagnose your problem and tell you what you can do about it. It only costs $10." Bill figured he had nothing to lose, so he filled a jar with a urine sample and went to the drug store. Finding the computer, he poured in the sample and deposited the $10. The computer started making some noise and various lights started flashing. After a brief pause out popped a small slip of paper on which was printed: "You have tennis elbow. Soak your arm in warm water. Avoid heavy lifting. It will be better in two weeks."
Later that evening while thinking how amazing this new technology was and how it would change medical science forever, he began to wonder if this machine could be fooled. He mixed together some tap water, a stool sample from his dog and urine samples from his wife and daughter. To top it off, he masturbated into the concoction. He went back to the drug store, located the machine, poured in the sample and deposited the $10. The computer again made the usual noise and printed out the following message:
"Your tap water is too hard. Get a water softener. Your dog has worms. Get him vitamins. Your daughter is using cocaine. Put her in a rehabilitation clinic. Your wife is pregnant with twin girls. They aren't yours. Get a lawyer. And if you don't stop jerking off, your tennis elbow will never get better."
It was the first day of school, and the elementary school teacher was establishing the fact that she'd take no nonsense from the kiddies this year. While taking the roll, she was told by one boy, "My name is Bob Fuckhauer."
Upset, the teacher said very loudly, "THERE'LL BE NONE OF THAT KIND OF BEHAVIOR IN MY CLASS THIS YEAR, now Bob; tell me your real name!"
The kid said, "No, really teacher, it is Bob Fuckhauer. You can go across the hall to fourth grade and ask my brother if you don't believe me!"
Not wanting to be subjected to that kind of thing, the teacher went across the hall and knocked on the fourth grade classroom door. The fourth grade teacher had stepped down the hall to the front office for a moment, so she entered the room and directly asked the class, "Do you have Fuckhauer in here?"
"Hell no!" replied a little kid from the front row, "We don't even get a damn cookie break!"
A fellow, who had spent his whole life in the desert, comes to visit a friend. He'd never seen a train or the tracks they run on. While standing in the middle of the railroad tracks one day, he hears this whistle -- Whooee da Whoee! -- but doesn't know what it is.
Predictably, he's hit and is thrown to the side of the tracks. It was only a glancing blow, so he was fortunate to receive some minor internal injuries, a few broken bones, and some bruises.
After weeks in the hospital recovering, he's at his friend's house attending a party one evening. While in the kitchen, he suddenly hears the tea kettle whistling. He grabs a baseball bat from the nearby closet and proceeds to batter and bash the tea kettle into an unrecognizable lump of metal. His friend, hearing the ruckus, rushes into the kitchen, sees what's happened and asks the desert man, "Why'd you ruin my good tea kettle?"
The desert man replies, "Man, you gotta kill these things when they're small."
A man and his brother were driving from Chattanooga to Atlanta for the weekend to see their mother. On the way down, they saw a man on the side of the road trying to catch a ride. The hitchhiker looked okay, he had on a nice black suit and a brown briefcase in his hand. So, the two men picked him up. On the way, the man kept fumbling around in his briefcase for something. The two brothers were beginning to become afraid there was something horrible in the briefcase, so the older brother said, " What's in the briefcase."
"None of your business," the man replied.
They continued on down the road. By now, the two brothers were really scared The younger brother was on the verge of a nervous breakdown. "What's in the briefcase?" the younger one asked again nervously.
"None of your business," he replied a little louder.
After a while the older brother pulled over into a gas station parking lot and the two brothers got out. " What do you think we should do?" one of them asked.
"Tell him to go to the bathroom because it's going to be a long ride," the other replied. So, they went back and told the man to go the bathroom. And he went. When he returned he found that the two brothers had driven away and left him behind. The brothers grabbed the briefcase and snapped it open, and you know what was in it?
It's None of Your Business!
Southern isms
Only a Southerner knows the difference between a hissie fit and a conniption fit, and that you don't 'HAVE' them, you 'PITCH' them.
Only a Southerner knows how many fish, collard greens, turnip greens, peas, beans, etc., make up 'a mess.'
Only a Southerner can show or point out to you the general direction of 'yonder.'
Only a Southerner knows exactly how long 'directly' is , . as in: 'Going to town, be back directly.'
Even Southern babies know that 'Gimme some sugar' is not a request for the white, granular sweet substance that sits in a pretty little bowl in the middle of the table.
All Southerners know exactly when 'by and by' is. They might not use the term, but they know the concept well.
Only a Southerner knows instinctively that the best gesture of solace for a neighbor who's got trouble is a plate of hot fried chicken and a big bowl of cold potato salad. If the neighbor's trouble is a real crisis, they also know to add a large banana puddin!
Only Southerners grow up knowing the difference between 'right near' and 'a right far piece.' They also know that 'just down the road' can be 1 mile or 20.
Only a Southerner, both knows and understands, the difference between a red neck, a good ol' boy, and po' white trash.
No true Southerner would ever assume that the car with the flashing turn signal is actually going to make a turn.
A Southerner knows that 'fix in' can be used as a noun, a verb, or an adverb.
Only Southerners make friends while standing in lines, ... and when we're 'in line,' . we talk to everybody!
Put 100 Southerners in a room and half of them will discover they're related, even if only by marriage.
In the South, y'all is singular, all y'all is plural.
Southerners know grits come from corn and how to eat them.
Every Southerner knows tomatoes with eggs, bacon, grits, and coffee are perfectly wonderful; that red eye gravy is also a breakfast food; and that fried green tomatoes are not a breakfast food.
When you hear someone say, 'Well, I caught myself lookin', ' you know you are in the presence of a genuine Southerner!
Only true Southerners say 'sweet tea,''sweet milk,' and 'light bread'. Sweet tea indicates the need for sugar and lots of it -- we do not like our tea unsweetened. 'Sweet milk' means you don't want buttermilk. And 'Light bread' is white bread.
And a true Southerner knows you don't scream obscenities at little old ladies who drive 30 MPH on the freeway. You just say,'Bless her heart' .. and go your own way.
To those of you who are still a little embarrassed by your Southerness: Take two tent revivals and a dose of sausage gravy and call me in the morning. Bless your heart!
And to those of you who are still having a hard time understanding all this Southern stuff, ... bless your hearts, I hear they are fixin' to have classes on Southernness as a second language
And for those that are not from the South but have lived here for a long time, all y'all need a sign to hang on y'alls front porch that reads 'I ain't from the South, but I got here as fast as I could .'
Trivia
Monday's Child is fair of face, Tuesday's child is full of grace, Wednesday's child is full of woe, Thursday's child has far to go, Friday's child is loving and giving, Saturday's child has to work for its living, But a child that's born on the Sabbath Day, Is fair and wise and good and gay.
During World War II, a German U-boat was sunk by a truck. The U-boat in question attacked a convoy in the Atlantic and then rose to see the effect. The merchant ship it sank had material strapped to its deck including a fleet of trucks, one of which was thrown in the air by the explosion, landing on the U-boat and breaking its back
The X's that people sometimes put at the end of letters or notes to mean a kiss, actually started back in the 1000's when Lords would sign their names at the end of documents to other important people. It was originally a cross that they would kiss after signing to signify that they were faithful to God and their King. Over the years though, it slanted into the X
Because their work was so physically demanding, slave sugar-cane cutters were the South's most costly field hands. At one point, their price became so high on the New Orleans slave market that the Louisiana planter tried to hire Irish and German immigrants instead. This plan backfired when the hired workers went on strike for double pay right in the middle of the sugar harvest.
More than two-thirds of the material going into landfills is degradable. However, very little change occurs because moisture is the most important environmental variable of degradation. Landfills are kept as dry as possible to help prevent groundwater contamination from runoff. For example, newspapers are still readable more than 20 years after being thrown away. Food, such as T-bone steaks and hot dogs, remain relatively unchanged for more than a decade.
Later that evening while thinking how amazing this new technology was and how it would change medical science forever, he began to wonder if this machine could be fooled. He mixed together some tap water, a stool sample from his dog and urine samples from his wife and daughter. To top it off, he masturbated into the concoction. He went back to the drug store, located the machine, poured in the sample and deposited the $10. The computer again made the usual noise and printed out the following message:
"Your tap water is too hard. Get a water softener. Your dog has worms. Get him vitamins. Your daughter is using cocaine. Put her in a rehabilitation clinic. Your wife is pregnant with twin girls. They aren't yours. Get a lawyer. And if you don't stop jerking off, your tennis elbow will never get better."
It was the first day of school, and the elementary school teacher was establishing the fact that she'd take no nonsense from the kiddies this year. While taking the roll, she was told by one boy, "My name is Bob Fuckhauer."
Upset, the teacher said very loudly, "THERE'LL BE NONE OF THAT KIND OF BEHAVIOR IN MY CLASS THIS YEAR, now Bob; tell me your real name!"
The kid said, "No, really teacher, it is Bob Fuckhauer. You can go across the hall to fourth grade and ask my brother if you don't believe me!"
Not wanting to be subjected to that kind of thing, the teacher went across the hall and knocked on the fourth grade classroom door. The fourth grade teacher had stepped down the hall to the front office for a moment, so she entered the room and directly asked the class, "Do you have Fuckhauer in here?"
"Hell no!" replied a little kid from the front row, "We don't even get a damn cookie break!"
A fellow, who had spent his whole life in the desert, comes to visit a friend. He'd never seen a train or the tracks they run on. While standing in the middle of the railroad tracks one day, he hears this whistle -- Whooee da Whoee! -- but doesn't know what it is.
Predictably, he's hit and is thrown to the side of the tracks. It was only a glancing blow, so he was fortunate to receive some minor internal injuries, a few broken bones, and some bruises.
After weeks in the hospital recovering, he's at his friend's house attending a party one evening. While in the kitchen, he suddenly hears the tea kettle whistling. He grabs a baseball bat from the nearby closet and proceeds to batter and bash the tea kettle into an unrecognizable lump of metal. His friend, hearing the ruckus, rushes into the kitchen, sees what's happened and asks the desert man, "Why'd you ruin my good tea kettle?"
The desert man replies, "Man, you gotta kill these things when they're small."
A man and his brother were driving from Chattanooga to Atlanta for the weekend to see their mother. On the way down, they saw a man on the side of the road trying to catch a ride. The hitchhiker looked okay, he had on a nice black suit and a brown briefcase in his hand. So, the two men picked him up. On the way, the man kept fumbling around in his briefcase for something. The two brothers were beginning to become afraid there was something horrible in the briefcase, so the older brother said, " What's in the briefcase."
"None of your business," the man replied.
They continued on down the road. By now, the two brothers were really scared The younger brother was on the verge of a nervous breakdown. "What's in the briefcase?" the younger one asked again nervously.
"None of your business," he replied a little louder.
After a while the older brother pulled over into a gas station parking lot and the two brothers got out. " What do you think we should do?" one of them asked.
"Tell him to go to the bathroom because it's going to be a long ride," the other replied. So, they went back and told the man to go the bathroom. And he went. When he returned he found that the two brothers had driven away and left him behind. The brothers grabbed the briefcase and snapped it open, and you know what was in it?
It's None of Your Business!
Southern isms
Only a Southerner knows the difference between a hissie fit and a conniption fit, and that you don't 'HAVE' them, you 'PITCH' them.
Only a Southerner knows how many fish, collard greens, turnip greens, peas, beans, etc., make up 'a mess.'
Only a Southerner can show or point out to you the general direction of 'yonder.'
Only a Southerner knows exactly how long 'directly' is , . as in: 'Going to town, be back directly.'
Even Southern babies know that 'Gimme some sugar' is not a request for the white, granular sweet substance that sits in a pretty little bowl in the middle of the table.
All Southerners know exactly when 'by and by' is. They might not use the term, but they know the concept well.
Only a Southerner knows instinctively that the best gesture of solace for a neighbor who's got trouble is a plate of hot fried chicken and a big bowl of cold potato salad. If the neighbor's trouble is a real crisis, they also know to add a large banana puddin!
Only Southerners grow up knowing the difference between 'right near' and 'a right far piece.' They also know that 'just down the road' can be 1 mile or 20.
Only a Southerner, both knows and understands, the difference between a red neck, a good ol' boy, and po' white trash.
No true Southerner would ever assume that the car with the flashing turn signal is actually going to make a turn.
A Southerner knows that 'fix in' can be used as a noun, a verb, or an adverb.
Only Southerners make friends while standing in lines, ... and when we're 'in line,' . we talk to everybody!
Put 100 Southerners in a room and half of them will discover they're related, even if only by marriage.
In the South, y'all is singular, all y'all is plural.
Southerners know grits come from corn and how to eat them.
Every Southerner knows tomatoes with eggs, bacon, grits, and coffee are perfectly wonderful; that red eye gravy is also a breakfast food; and that fried green tomatoes are not a breakfast food.
When you hear someone say, 'Well, I caught myself lookin', ' you know you are in the presence of a genuine Southerner!
Only true Southerners say 'sweet tea,''sweet milk,' and 'light bread'. Sweet tea indicates the need for sugar and lots of it -- we do not like our tea unsweetened. 'Sweet milk' means you don't want buttermilk. And 'Light bread' is white bread.
And a true Southerner knows you don't scream obscenities at little old ladies who drive 30 MPH on the freeway. You just say,'Bless her heart' .. and go your own way.
To those of you who are still a little embarrassed by your Southerness: Take two tent revivals and a dose of sausage gravy and call me in the morning. Bless your heart!
And to those of you who are still having a hard time understanding all this Southern stuff, ... bless your hearts, I hear they are fixin' to have classes on Southernness as a second language
And for those that are not from the South but have lived here for a long time, all y'all need a sign to hang on y'alls front porch that reads 'I ain't from the South, but I got here as fast as I could .'
Trivia
Monday's Child is fair of face, Tuesday's child is full of grace, Wednesday's child is full of woe, Thursday's child has far to go, Friday's child is loving and giving, Saturday's child has to work for its living, But a child that's born on the Sabbath Day, Is fair and wise and good and gay.
During World War II, a German U-boat was sunk by a truck. The U-boat in question attacked a convoy in the Atlantic and then rose to see the effect. The merchant ship it sank had material strapped to its deck including a fleet of trucks, one of which was thrown in the air by the explosion, landing on the U-boat and breaking its back
The X's that people sometimes put at the end of letters or notes to mean a kiss, actually started back in the 1000's when Lords would sign their names at the end of documents to other important people. It was originally a cross that they would kiss after signing to signify that they were faithful to God and their King. Over the years though, it slanted into the X
Because their work was so physically demanding, slave sugar-cane cutters were the South's most costly field hands. At one point, their price became so high on the New Orleans slave market that the Louisiana planter tried to hire Irish and German immigrants instead. This plan backfired when the hired workers went on strike for double pay right in the middle of the sugar harvest.
More than two-thirds of the material going into landfills is degradable. However, very little change occurs because moisture is the most important environmental variable of degradation. Landfills are kept as dry as possible to help prevent groundwater contamination from runoff. For example, newspapers are still readable more than 20 years after being thrown away. Food, such as T-bone steaks and hot dogs, remain relatively unchanged for more than a decade.
DONT EVER STOP DREAMING
Dreams are a big part of our Lives
and You must do whatever it takes
to make them a Reality;
by the plans you make,
the course you take,
and the things you do.
Don't dwell on past mistakes.
Leave yesterday behind,
along with all it's problems,
worries and doubts.
Realize you can't change the past,
but you can start a new tomorrow.
Don't try to do everything at once;
take one step at a time,
Don't ever be afraid to try the Impossible
no matter what others may think.
Remember you are Unique
in your own special way.
Don't ever stop Dreaming!
Don't ever stop wanting what's right for you!
HAVE A NICE DAY